Adventures At Starbucks

A couple of days ago, FW, MJ and I went down to Starbucks to get our morning salvation.

Inside there was this elderly black woman, the kind of woman you look at and just immediately assume is one of those wise old women who has wonderful old stories to share and some sort of fascinatingly wickedly fun past full of adventure and daringness and history, the kind of woman you think must be one of the last remnants of true human compassion, enlightenment, and tolerance.

She wasn’t ready to pay yet as she was searching through her bags — one of those carry-ons on wheels with the pull out handle and a stuffed-to the gills totebag — so MJ and FW went on and ordered and paid and got their coffees. She was ready right as I was stepping up, so she stepped right on up and managed to roll over my foot, but I just smiled, because she was older and I’ve been taught to have patience with my elders. Despite the two cash registers, she managed to edge me away from the counter with her bulk and baggage and by rolling over my feet another couple of times, but I just smiled and waited my turn.

After that was done, I went to join my co-workers while I waited my iced caramel macchiato. MJ and FW were happily standing no where in particular discussing work — not gossipy type stuff but actual programming stuff.

While I was fetching my caramel coffee goodness, the elderly lady who had made her home at a small table about three steps from MJ and FW began to use her straw to fling milk on MJ. When MJ asked her to stop, the woman told her that she wouldn’t until MJ took her hands out of her pockets — MJ had been standing with one hand in her coat pocket. The woman told her, “This ain’t the ACLU, you know; this is the human race! You can’t just stand around with your hands in your pockets!”

MJ and I were at a loss of words and made our exit from the Starbucks. MJ was even commenting on how surprised she was because she thought up until then that the woman looked like one of those wise old women you just like to know. FW however got into some sort of shouting match with the woman and the last thing I heard him shout before he came outside was “Get help, Lady!”

All I can think is that in about 40 years, that could be one of the three of us and some guy could be shouting at one of us, “Get help, Lady!”

tags: WTF, Starbucks, ACLU, coffee, crazy

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